Holiday Stress and Anxiety: Unwrapping Joy

The holiday season is often expected to be a time of joy, warmth, and togetherness. However, These are not the only feelings you might experience. For many individuals, it can also be a source of holiday stress and anxiety. A recent poll by the American Psychiatric Association found that nearly one in three people expect an increase in stress this holiday session. If this sounds like you, you are not alone. 

The pressure of holiday shopping, gifts, travel expenses, hosting or attending social gatherings, and managing a packed calendar of holiday events can increase stress and anxiety. Coping with all these pressures and expectations accompanying the holidays can be challenging. Still, with the right strategies, it is possible to experience the season with more tranquillity and happiness. In this article, we explore how psychotherapy can help individuals cope with holiday stress and anxiety.

Understanding Holiday Stress and Anxiety

Holiday stress refers to the emotional and physical strain experienced during the festive season due to various triggers. Anxiety related to the holidays can manifest as anticipatory worry, panic attacks, or even social anxiety. Before delving into the strategies, it is essential to understand what holiday stress and anxiety entail. To manage holiday stress and anxiety, it’s important to understand their causes and take steps to enjoy the holidays to the fullest.

It is essential to recognize your triggers. Otherwise, you won’t know what is causing you additional stress and anxiety this holiday season. If you find it challenging to identify your triggers, working with a therapist might help.  

Common Cause of Holiday Stress and Anxiety

1. High unattainable expectations: Many people associate the holidays with social gatherings, rituals, and happy memories. The pressure to perfect every meal and gift can lead to overwhelming stress, anxiety, and disappointment.
2. Financial concerns: The holidays can be expensive, and the pressure to buy gifts for loved ones can be overwhelming. Especially as things have gotten more expensive over the past year, overspending on gifts, groceries, and travel can lead to financial stress.
3. Family issues and conflicts: The holidays can exacerbate family issues and conflicts. Feeling as though you need to live up to others’ expectations or that they are not living up to yours. Hosting gatherings or managing a packed calendar of holiday events can add to the stress, as there needs to be more time in the month to get everything done.
4. Loneliness and grief: The holidays can be difficult for those who are alone or grieving. Loneliness and grief can also be heightened during the holidays.
5. Excessive eating and drinking: The temptation to self-medicate, binge eat, or drink excessively during the holidays can exacerbate negative feelings and lead to stress, anxiety, and disappointment. It can also be disappointing not to follow your healthy eating/drinking plan.
6. Overcommitment: The holiday season can be long and full of commitments, from parties to PTA meetings. Overcommitment can lead to stress and anxiety. Again, if only there were more time in your day to get everything done! Finding the time to attend every party you were invited to or feeling like you haven’t been invited to enough parties can increase stress.
7. Holiday noise and bustle: The noise and bustle in stores and malls during the holiday season can irritate even the calmest shopper. And why do the stores seem more disorganized and find it harder to find what you are looking for? 

Identifying Symptoms of Stress and Anxiety

How do you know if you are experiencing holiday stress? 

Holiday stress and anxiety can present themselves in many different ways. They could be emotional, mental or physical. Either way, it is essential to recognize the symptoms of holiday stress and anxiety so that you can take practical steps to reduce them leading up to the holidays. It is also important to know the symptoms of holiday stress in case you need to seek appropriate help and support.

Here are some common symptoms of holiday stress and anxiety: 

• Anxiety: Anxiety can be a common symptom of holiday stress. It can manifest as feelings of nervousness, worry, or unease. You can also feel it physically, like a tightness in your chest or a racing heart, for no apparent reason. 
• Sadness: The holidays can be difficult for those who are alone or grieving. Loneliness and grief can also be heightened during the holidays, leading to an increase in feelings of sadness.
• Headaches: Stress can cause tension in your body, especially around your shoulders, neck and jaw. This manifests as headaches, a common symptom of holiday stress, especially if you can’t identify another reason for the headaches. 
• Body aches: Not only can you experience headaches, but stress can also cause muscle tension and aches. Sometimes, it can feel like you’ve just worked out even though you haven’t.
• Inability to sleep: Stress and anxiety can make falling or staying asleep difficult. This is because your mind keeps spiralling around many thoughts, plans and preparations. As discussed in my previous blog post: The Importance of Sleep Hygiene. Getting a good night’s sleep is incredibly important for our mental health. 
• Irritability:  Even for those who are generally calm and patient, stress and anxiety can make individuals more irritable and short-tempered. Suppose you find yourself getting annoyed easily or snapping at people when you usually wouldn’t or at things that generally wouldn’t bother you. You might be experiencing higher levels of stress and anxiety. 
• Excessive drinking and Overeating: Stress and anxiety can lead to overeating and/or excessive drinking, which can cause physical discomfort and feelings of guilt. The temptation to cope using unhealthy coping strategies like binge eating or excessive drinking coincides with the party spirit of the holidays, which can exacerbate negative feelings. 
• Fatigue: The demands of shopping, parties, family obligations, and house guests can contribute to feeling overwhelmed and increased tension, leading to fatigue. Plus, if you do not sleep enough each night, you will wake up the next day feeling exhausted, irritated, and in a lower mood. Learn how to get The Importance of Sleep Hygiene: Tips for a Better Night’s Rest on my other post.
• Post-holiday sadness: Some individuals may experience post-holiday sadness, usually around or after New Year’s Day. This can result from having high unmet expectations and

Tips for Managing Stress and Anxiety During the Holiday Season

Managing stress and anxiety during the holiday season can be challenging. However, there are some practical steps that you can take to minimize your stress levels.  Practicing mindfulness and meditation, preventing burnout, maintaining healthy habits, being realistic, and reaching out to others can all help reduce stress and anxiety. Setting boundaries and saying no to commitments that may be overwhelming, developing a holiday budget, creating relaxing surroundings, sharing feelings, and accepting imperfection.

Here are some tips for managing stress and anxiety during the holiday season:

1. Practice mindfulness and meditation: Mindfulness can be a valuable mental wellness tool all year round, not just for the holidays. It involves focusing on the present moment and accepting it without judgment. Meditation can help reduce stress and anxiety by calming the mind and body. Our bodies can’t be both calm and anxious at the same time. 
2. Maintain healthy habits: Healthy habits during the holiday season will be one of your best defences against stress. This means getting enough sleep, eating well, and staying physically active. It also means maintaining what you can of your daily routine, like workouts, book club, or personal self-care time. Fit holiday obligations into your everyday routine rather than letting them upset your life.
3. Be realistic: The holiday season can be long and full of commitments, from parties to PTA meetings. To help manage stress, list what you expect from yourself, what others expect from you, and what your holiday responsibilities are. Place them on a calendar to get a feel for what the coming months will look like. Get comfortable with the idea that you don’t have to do everything; everything doesn’t have to be perfect, which is okay.
4. Reach out: The holidays can be difficult for those who are alone or grieving. Reach out to friends and family, or volunteer at a local charity. Helping others can be a great way to boost your mood and reduce stress. 
5. Preventing burnout – It’s okay to say no: For many, the holiday season brings joy but can also bring more stress and conflicting obligations. It is important to prioritize and simplify: prioritize things that bring you joy and allow you to emotionally recharge (people or activities) and simplify when possible. It might be nice to make your grandmother’s cookie recipe from scratch for every holiday, but buying cookies at the store and celebrating is okay if making the cookies is stressful for you this year. However, If you really want your grandmother’s cookies for the holidays but have too much on your plate, ask someone for help.

Establishing Boundaries and Simplifying Holiday Obligations

Setting realistic expectations and boundaries is essential to preventing excessive stress and anxiety. Not only is it important to communicate openly with loved ones regarding limitations and learn to say no when necessary, it is also essential to have realistic expectations and boundaries for yourself. Rather than stretching yourself too thin, focusing on essential activities and traditions helps create a more enjoyable holiday experience. If you struggle with setting boundaries in general, my post on The Importance of Healthy Boundaries may be helpful.

Some of those boundaries may look like:

1. Develop a holiday budget: Decide what you can afford and stick to it. Spending money on your loved ones is a kind gesture, but paying your energy bill is important, ensuring you have food on the table and covering rent or your mortgage. Don’t buy gifts that you’ll be paying off for the rest of the year.
2. Create relaxing surroundings: Turn on music, light candles, or open the windows on a sunny day. Research has found that listening to music and the scent of citrus can boost feelings of well-being, and vitamin D is always a happiness booster, which is something those of us in Canada struggle with getting enough of. 
3. Share feelings: You are only one person and can do so much. Be realistic about how much you can handle this season. Forget about perfection. Those around you most likely won’t notice anything is imperfect. Relax and enjoy the company surrounding you.
4. Keep sight of what really counts: Determine what is most important to you and prioritize those things. This will help you say no to commitments not aligning with your values or interests.

The holiday season can be a stressful time, but there are ways to manage stress and anxiety. Practicing mindfulness and meditation, preventing burnout by saying no, maintaining healthy habits, being realistic, and reaching out to others can all help. Setting boundaries and saying no to commitments that may be overwhelming, developing a holiday budget, creating relaxing surroundings, sharing feelings, accepting imperfection, and not losing sight of what counts are also effective strategies.

The Role of Psychotherapy in Coping with These Feelings

While self-help techniques can be beneficial in the short term, seeking support from a qualified therapist can be beneficial for managing holiday stress and anxiety effectively in the long term. Therapy can be incredibly beneficial in managing stress and anxiety during the holidays. It provides a safe and supportive space to explore your feelings, develop effective coping strategies, and gain insight into your thoughts and behaviours, which might keep you stuck in repeating patterns and cycles. Therapists specialize in providing personalized guidance and strategies tailored to your circumstances. If any of the strategies listed to help you cope with holiday stress seem challenging to do alone, therapy can help.

 Remember to take care of yourself this holiday season!

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